Ten Excuses for not coming to Work
(10) A friend I hadn’t seen for years turned up when I was setting off for the office. Wouldn’t it be rude to leave him/her without a company?
(9) I can’t come to office today because my father is seriously ill and he is in a hospital. I’ve got be there when he shows his testamentary.
(8) [...]
Ten Excuses for breaking up with someone you love
(10) Last night my best friend asked something of me and because he/she is my best friend I can’t say no… I’m going to have a sex change operation next week.
(9) I’ve just realized that we are planets apart.
(8) I’ve joined Mossad now and I just don’t want to put your life in [...]
Ten Excuses for not attending church on Sunday
(10) As the son of an Anglican mother and a Catholic father I’m confused about if my child should go to an Anglican Church or a Catholic Church.
(9) Didn’t one of the Commandments read “Thou shan’t do anything of Sundays.”?
(8) My friends call me Judas, how can I go to church?
(7) How can you go [...]
Ten excuses to tell to police
(10) The stationary truck was coming the other way.
(9) I didn’t realize when my car crossed the speed limit because I was too busy, as a good Christian, trying to tell the driver of that yellow car that his indicators weren’t functioning.
(8) I got a call from a friend and he said my wife was [...]
Ten excuses for not doing your homework
(10) I didn’t want to add to your already heavy workload.
(9) My father had a nervous breakdown and he cut all my notebooks to make little paper dolls.
(8) I got my head caught in the power window of the car and had to spend the entire night in the garage.
(7) I’m suffering from Ergasiaspitiouphobia [...]
Ten excuses for not filing your tax returns
(10) Filing tax returns contradicts my religious beliefs.
(9) I told my accountant to pay the taxes, hasn’t she done that yet?
(8) I’ve just had a divorce and the emotional trauma was so much that I didn’t remember to pay my taxes.
(7) And a friend of mine told me I couldn’t pay the taxes for 2010 [...]
Ten Excuses for not paying your Rent
(10) Why should I pay the rent? I wasn’t here for the whole month. I was with my wife enjoying the honeymoon.
(9) I’ll pay you next month.
(8) I’ve to spend it on my dying grandmother… You can’t be cruel enough to let my grandmother die, would you?
(7) My bank closed my account without even telling [...]
Ten Excuses for reaching the school late
(10) I was on my way but the sign board near the school said GO SLOW SCHOOL AHEAD.
(9) I was taken aboard an alien spaceship and I was abducted there.
(8) How could I be late? My friend told me an hour ago it was still five in the morning in Japan.
(7) Someone locked me [...]
Ten Excuses for getting late to your office
(10) The electricity people had to come to my house to read the meter and they come only once every couple of months
.
(9) I’m not later, you know, if we go by the Chinese Standard Time.
(8) My dog swallowed the keys of my motorbike/car and I had to take it to a vet.
(7) There was [...]
Ten Excuses for not getting a job
(10) They say they are looking for someone fluent in Chinese.
(9) I’m not well. It’s not possible for me to work for hours on end.
(8) Do you think I stand a chance of finding a job under these economic conditions?
(7) I’m not conversant with computers.
(6) You know, I don’t lie and a job [...]